“Different, not less” This quote is from the Temple Grandin story- I recently saw a movie about her life on HBO. She’s a very, VERY talented woman who had to deal with her server autism and overcame a lot of sexism in the 60’s and 70’s. She went on to get her PhD in science and animal science. The most inspiring part of the story for me was that her mom NEVER gave up on her daughter, who was different, not less.
I made the decision to home school/unschool/Waldorf style a few months ago, after months of contemplating. My original plan was to finish college, get a BA in education and work for the sad ASD (anchorage school dist). This career would allow me to get off of work when my kids got out of school. But why not sacrifice the money (which isn’t much), skip the middle man (a teacher who sees my kids as their job) and teach them myself (someone who these kids mean the world to). I mean, the worst part of my day is rushing Aiden through the door in the morning to get to school. Then making sure I’m home to get him off the school bus. Then we’re left with barley a few hours to walk outside and have free play. What if the day was open to do what we wanted- when we wanted?
Here are the two incidents that pushed this decision: Aiden has a wonderful teacher this year who doesn’t allow sugar in the classroom! I mean she is great, but there is this much challenged kid in his class who kicks/punches/hits Aiden on a daily bases. He has his own teacher to control him but it continues to happen. The second incident was because of the budget cuts, the class room size is going to increase dramatically- like 30 kids to 1 teacher- seems to me like there’s going to be a lot of kids falling through the cracks in this system. If Aiden is getting beat up in a class of 5 what’s it going to be like with 30? One time I was hanging out on the play ground last year during the 2nd grade recess. I overheard a conversation between 3 boys about how they were going to jump another boy later that day, OMG.
I am just proud of myself for making this choice – in the same way I chose to be a SAHM. After all, my mom dumped me with a babysitter at the tender age of 2 months (she didn’t breastfeed me either, damn you mom lol J/k). The sitters I had through my childhood could not even speak English- I’m not saying that’s bad- but I think of how that effected my development. I also question the amount of attention I received from them – I once chewed my way out of a play pen when I was 1 , fell down 2 flights of stair as a toddler and fell of a balcony when I was 7. . . okay that last one was probably my fault lol, but still.
I really feel this will change their lives; my worst memories are of sitting in those boring ass classes with teachers that made me feel worse than I already felt about myself. Having to Learn about one perspective of history made me boil with anger in JHS and HS. I tried so hard to fit into this mold, I was so not motivated to learn their way. This school system is designed to produce employees not creative-fully functioning beings. Aiden already knows how to do his own laundry, something I didn’t know till I was in college lol. He’s also taking Inupiaq language classes with dad. Next is soccer this spring. These are things of true value – memorizing the pledge of allegiances is not.
I’m not saying I should win parent of the year award, I haven’t always made the best choices of parenting. But I learned from (most) of my mistakes and am on the right path. I was really still a child mentally when Aiden was born (4 day after my 20th bday), but this expirence has quickly turned me into adult.
This is a future thank you/gift for my children, Aiden and Audrey.
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ReplyDeleteI have been getting a few books from the library about unschooling and homeschooling. Recently I have been teaching Winter about the solar system that was after his learned about his body parts and internal organs. I am still trying to find balance with raw foods. It takes a so much bravery to pull your child out of situation that was bad and make his love of learning in to your own hands. I changed my major from education to Librarian science and animal biology. I wanted to watch that HBO special but we do not get cable, I had her book on tape, "Animals Make Us Human." Temple Grandin is amazing and her approach to understanding animals is amazing, I take what I learned from her to my out look in life. So many areas of her book were interrelated to our every day life and human interactions. It sounds like that other child is abused at home, children usually do what they learn from others. I was thinking about joining a raw community to learn and have support from others, there is a math tutor at the school who is vegan/raw. I have not talked to him but I want to, if only to learn and understand what I can not alone. I am learning my language and am in my second year of sign language, my son Winter is a late speaker and he is just not putting sentences together and surprising us with new sayings. I love not talking, overrated with singing I can communicate with my son in beautiful silence. I am also learning Paiute for myself and then to teach Winter. Mike speaks his language fairly well, he wants to wait until Winter comes along with English before he jumps in to Anishaabe. I think I will use sign as a communication bridge when I start teaching Winter Paiute. I am very protective of him and have thought about homeschooling. Bonnie you are the best. I have one other friend who really gets it and I am glad I know you both.
ReplyDeleteI was searching for Anchorage unschoolers and found your blog. Are still planning to homeschool this year? I am trying to organize a group for activities. If you are interested, check out www.anchoragelifelearners.org
ReplyDeleteI'm planning a not-back-to-school play day for next week.